The St. Tim’s Saga Continues

Another chapter in the saga that is St. Timothy’s parish appears to be coming to a close. As far as most people are concerned this chapter, short as it was, could not have ended fast enough. It has been one frustrating incident after another whereby the communication between pastor and parishioners was seriously lacking, and where the amount of leeway provided to the pastor by the parishioners was close to zero. In less than a year what had been a cry for leadership for a pastorless parish became the cry of FOUL for sending a leader so out of touch with the parish’s needs. But now that year has come and gone, and it appears that new leadership is just around the corner. And this begs the question: Is St. Timothy ready for what is coming next?

So where does this humble blogger stand with regards to this argument? Let me begin by stating that paragraph #1 above is my perception of what the majority of the parish appeared to be feeling. It was not universal. I knew many parishioners who really liked the man and felt that he was exactly what the parish needed. I knew many parishioners also who felt that it was more than a man out of touch at our helm, but more a man with an agenda who could care less about the parish assigned him. I tend to believe that both these extremes represent a very narrow minded thought process whereby the ideas of others regarding the man were never given proper credence. I personally liked the man, but felt that he was just not the right fit for this parish. He is a deeply spiritual man, one the likes of which we have never seen at our parish and may never see again. I think he had many gifts to offer to a parish that has been deficient in that area, but just didn’t have the right channels to provide that kind of help to his flock. Fr. Rivero, in my estimation had a very real relationship with the God that I have so much trouble maintaining a consistent relationship with. But he didn’t have a personal relationship with me or with the majority of those he led, and this led to confusion and to misunderstanding. I also think it is safe to say that he didn’t make much of an effort in his one year in the parish to fix this particular problem. This may be reason enough to deem us ready for a new leader. Then again, it may have been reason enough for us to work on creating a relationship with a man who had trouble reaching out. Maybe it was to be our job to reach out to him. We’ll never know for sure now, though, as he now will be moving on to wherever God sends him next.

I’d like to believe that everything that happened was in God’s plan, and it very well may have been. I just have trouble believing that the polarizing of this parish was something God wanted. One of the things that really bothered me, moreso than the rift between the shepherd and his flock, was the schism existing among the flock itself. The amount of finger pointing was ridiculous. The blame game was in full force for the last few months, and the blame for this great divide was put squarely on the shoulders of our pastor. The truth is that the fault for this rift was the parish itself, where many of the members just couldn’t fathom that someone would actually see things differently in the matter than what they were seeing. I heard many a person stating that they couldn’t believe that “such and such is backing Fr. Jordi”, or that that person is “so blinded by what they want in a pastor that they don’t give this guy a chance”. People refused to speak to each other over the issue where it was their perception of the issue that was different. The reality of what was happening was the same for everybody after all. And a new pastor is not going to fix this one flaw of ours. The healing needs to begin within now, or our parish is going to disintegrate regardless of whom they send, Jesus Christ Himself included. It is time for us to forgive and ask for forgiveness. And we should begin this process at the very top with our still existing pastor. The Our Father calls for us to do so, and so we need to do this, whether we believe that forgiveness is in order, or necessary, or not. Again it is our perception that is the key here. If we hurt someone whether it was our intention to do so or not, and whether we realized we hurt them or not, does not matter. Nor does it minimize the pain of the person(s) being hurt. I think many people have been hurt unintentionally (and in some cases intentionally), and the healing process needs to begin. NOW. Before the successor arrives. This is going to take a great amount of humility on the part of all parties. I’m willing to do so, and I really am not sure if I hurt anybody with my views, but I can’t allow myself to believe that I am so above the necessity to forgive and be forgiven, for as a member of this parish both my voice and my silence have contributed to the situation we find ourselves in, and I should be held accountable.

So, to anybody, whom I may have hurt, I beg forgiveness. And anybody who feels they need forgiveness, I am willing to forgive, even if they feel it unnecessary.

Now, I do need to address some issues that do bother me with regards to the beginning of the next chapter. Every new beginning brings changes. And we need to be willing to accept those changes. Many times we have a hard time accepting change, but it’s a reality we face, and one that as a parish you would figure we’d be used to. Heck since Fr. Miyares was moved from our parish some 20 years ago we’ve had a revolving door of pastors (Capdepon, LaCerra, Navarro, Castillo, Bishop Noonan as acting administrator, Rivero, and a pastor to be named later… it almost sounds like the Florida Marlins roster with how often it’s changed!). And yet change is something people just can’t get used to. But a warning to everybody: Change is going to happen. My prayer is that it is gradual, and that we have time to adapt as the changes come. So what bothers me so much? For starters, actual change that happened over the last year was not very much. It was just very obvious. And not that I agreed with the changes that did happen (I disagreed and was very upset with two of the changes that did happen, not to mention them by name), but other changes not made spoke volumes to me. Yet many didn’t consider these when judging our appointed leader. One thing that Fr. Jordi did that was commendable was that he kept a very hard working office staff practically intact. As someone who works very closely with those in the office, that made my job a lot easier. This, though, is not the norm. Usually pastors come in and clean house (which, by the way, is their absolute right… why shouldn’t they work with a staff that they are comfortable with, after all, a staff that he can trust from the outset). We may see our next pastor come in and send our current office staff packing or having to move into a new position. And though it may seem unfair, it’s the nature of the business. I for one don’t want to see any of them go, but it’s not my call. And I should not judge my new pastor based on whatever decision he makes regarding the staff. But many will… and unfairly. Yet, it was the call for our current pastor’s head that may put many of our friends out of a job real soon. So, start praying for them right now! I already have. In these tough economic times it would be very difficult for our office staff to find somewhere new to go. (BTW, if you are the new pastor reading this, I vouch for these people… they deserve to stick around doing their great work).

If the rumors are correct (and yes there are only rumors for now… nothing is etched in stone), then on paper there is nothing to worry about regarding the new pastor. I can say that I’ve seen him in action. He is a great homilist and seems to have a great rapport with the members of the parishes he has been in. I know a number of people who know him personally and can vouch for him. A close friend of mine who no longer lives in Miami still considers him his spiritual director despite the distance between them. These are the kind of things that I like to hear. I can see no reason why we should worry if he is the next pastor coming in. I actually am really looking forward to seeing him in our parish, and getting an opportunity to work closely with him. But excuse me if I’m not exactly jumping for joy yet. A number of years back, we got another pastor with such great credentials and really no down side as far as I was concerned. I felt like he was a great pastor all around and a worthy successor to the pastor he replaced. I had known him since I was 10 years old and was looking forward to watching my parish grow under his tutelage. But, despite all the great promise, things didn’t pan out the way things could have for our parish. For one, though I thought he did a great job, he did make one decision that really irked me, and many others. He got rid of the parish carnival. Now, at the time, I had no ties whatsoever to the carnival. I simply was another parishioner that attended the annual event and found it a wonderful way for me to share time with members of the community I would otherwise not come in contact with (look, even now I’m trying to sell you its importance… any volunteers, we need some help this transition year!!). But, I couldn’t understand why our pastor felt the need to end such a wonderful parish tradition. Many were not happy about that. But let me make something clear… it was his right as a pastor to make that decision, and though many of us didn’t like it that would not have been reason for us to assume that he didn’t care for us as a parish. The second issue with regards to this pastor was that he barely lasted two years. Before we got a chance to really grow as a parish with our new leader he was moved elsewhere. I felt like I was a foster child being removed from my caregiver just as I was really getting comfortable with the way he did things, only to have to relearn things all over again. How do we know that our new pastor, no matter how wonderful he is, is not going to make a radical change that we do not all foresee? Our current pastor did and we were all up in arms! But wasn’t it his right (whether we agreed with him or not) to do so. We may face the same thing again. And how can we be so sure that our new pastor will be with us long enough for us to start growing in a healthy way as a parish? We don’t. Not even our new pastor knows what’s in store for him or for how long. We must be ready for whatever comes… something we weren’t prepared to face just a year ago.

And what if this new pastor (assuming now that it’s not the rumored one, but some other pastor we are just not expecting to be assigned to us) comes in and is an even BIGGER problem than before. Do we start up the witch hunt again, until we get one to our liking? Isn’t this (to a much lesser degree) how our Catholic Church little by little has splintered into the thousands of denominations that currently exist? Do we not have sufficient faith in our Lord that He knows what He is doing when a new pastor is assigned to us?

Now, don’t get me wrong. I am not saying that it wasn’t within our rights to stand up and let our voices be heard. Change only comes when we stand up for what we believe. But we must be careful in the process. Maybe the change we want is not what’s best for us. We are still children when it comes to faith and many times our cries are like those of a child to an unbending parent who is standing by his guns. From time to time the child may be right. But the majority of the time, it is the parent that knows what he is doing, and it will remain for the child to look back one day and realize that he couldn’t see the big picture at the time. Are we seeing the big picture clearly? Maybe we are. But let’s not kid ourselves, we still don’t know that for sure, and to assume so would be rather cocky for a bunch of young and naïve children of faith. I must stress though, that we be very careful before we step out and try to repeat this whole process even if this new pastor winds up being worse than what we currently have, which many at the moment consider to be impossible. (I for one have had experience with what a truly bad pastor could do… Fr. Jordi was not that. Trust me)

We are currently at a crossroads here at St. Tim’s (for those of our former Young Adult group, there is no pun intended). We need to proceed with much caution. And we need to proceed as ONE. And to quote Bono, we must remember that we are “ONE, but we are not the same. We must carry each other.” If we are too stubborn to do so, as I mentioned earlier, we will fall apart at the seems. And I fear that if we don’t get our act together, we may wind up as so many other parishes have in the last year or so. We may wind up without St. Timothy. Our Archbishop has proven that he is not opposed to closing down parishes to save a little money. Who’s to say that he won’t close down one that is utterly disgruntled and proving to be a financial burden to the Archdiocese? He doesn’t need another headache… and let’s face it we have been a royal pain in his (choose your favorite body part to end this phrase). He has shown us no favoritism in the past (let’s see, no pastor for a year and a half, and then one that, from what I understand, was placed in St. Tim’s against the recommendations of the priests assigned to help place pastors), and we have no reason to believe that he has fallen madly in love with us in the last 6 months. So, to put it succinctly, we must prove our worth. We’ve done it in the past, of course. I’ve always seen us as a strong and vibrant parish with a good amount of diversity and a very big heart. But we need to hurry up and prove it now to ourselves again, to our new pastor, and to our very skeptical archbishop. It’s a tall order, really. Are we up to the task? I sure hope so. I, for one, am up for the challenge.

So, the next chapter begins in a couple of months. Let’s not turn any pages just yet and let this current chapter end properly. We have time to give it, if not a happy ending, at least one that will have us ready to transition smoothly into the next unread (and unwritten, as of yet) chapter. To all who read this, please pray for us. We need the prayers. Also, please pray for Fr. Jordi Rivero and whatever lies ahead for him. May he positively touch the lives of all he comes in contact with in his new endeavors. And pray for our incoming pastor, that he may be ready for us, and all the baggage we are bringing with us. This is going to be very interesting to say the least. May God bless us all!!