Jeff’s Ex

CHAPTER 37

JEFF’S EX  Marty and Jeff moseyed into the watering hole. They had been told that there was a surprise for them by a few of their friends. 

“This better be good,” said Marty as he got a feel for the place. “It has to be. Noah never calls us, and suddenly he calls us out of the blue. Something is definitely up.” Jeff paused, then continued, “What I’m wondering is why he sent us to a camel reserve.” 

“No kidding,” Jeff responded, “a couple of llamas like us are going to stick out like Asain elephants in an African reserve!” Jeff looked around and caught sight of Noah, a taller, yet slighly chunkier llama who camouflaged himself a little better among the camels. 

“Hey guys, what’s up?” asked Noah. “Not much except for the fact that we got carded at the door. They confused us for prepubescent camels since we don’t have humps. It was kind of embarrassing,” replied Jeff. 

Marty continued, “You can say that again! This better be good Noah because I’m not very comfortable here. What’s going on?” “All right, I’ll get to the point. Jeff, I ran into your ex here the other day, and I thought that I should tell you. I happened to know she’s coming here today, so i asked you guys to come.” 

“My ex?” inquired Jeff, “Why would I be interested in her? She let herself go and I couldn’t take it. I can’t see anybody being with that hag…” Noah interrupted, “I don’t know Jeff. You may have to see for yourself…” 

Suddenly, Marty jumped in, “Jeff, Noah, get a load of that dame right there. Now that is one honey of a camel! Check out the humps on her! (Whistle) I’d like to get a closer look at those.” Jeff turned around to look and his mouth dropped wide open. “That’s no camel… that’s…” 

“Miriam, your ex,” finished Noah. “But she was a llama, now she’s a… a… camel?” Jeff was confused. 

“Still a llama, Jeff. She got implants,” was Noah’s reply. “You thought she’d never get over you. Well, she’s obviously moved on. I thought you needed to see for yourself and not have to hear it through the network. I gotta go.” Noah turned and left Jeff and Marty. Jeff stared in disbelief, and suddenly, she approached. 

She walked right by Jeff and murmurred in passing, “Hey Jeff,” then continued along without a second thought. Jeff didn’t know if he was turned on or disgusted. He just knew that it was definitely the end of he and Miriam. And possibly his dignity. She left him to become A CAMEL!! “So you know, Jeff,” said Marty interrupting his thoughts, “I have always had a thing for camels. Would it be a problem if I, you know, asked or out or something?” 

Jeff looked at his friend with obvious dismay, then spit him in the eyes and grabbed him with his overbite by the ear and began to drag him out of the area. “OWOWOWOWOW!!!!” yelled Marty. 

“Serves you right, you moron, checking out my ex!” They left and Jeff went home to sulk about the situation. “IMPLANTS!” 

The End