Lunch with my Boy
You know some things in life make you wonder about the absurdity that exists in this world… hence LO #1. (LO is for LIFE OCCURRENCE, not an even shorter form of JLo) Others make you ponder about what the world is coming to. Some things are laughable, while others make you want to scream or cry in disgust. My most recent LO leans to the latter.
Last Saturday, Lucas went to his first soccer practice. I was amazed at how well he played for someone who had never done this sort of stuff in an organized setting. I was so proud of the little tyke who quite honestly never struck me as very athletic. When practice was done, I asked him what he wanted to eat. “PIZZA!!” was his response. He told me he wanted to go to a pizza place close to our house that served pizza “I like”. We went. As fortune would have it they didn’t serve slices and the pizza was not going to be done for about 20 to 30 minutes. TOO LONG FER THESE HUNGRY BOYS. (FER purposely spelled like this for effect… what effect, I have NOO idea) It is then that my latest LO took place. Next to the pizza place there sits a Quizno’s. Lucas told me he would like to go there instead, so we did. We entered the place and the manager, whom I’ve met casually in the restaurant before greeted us with a smile. He has always been very pleasant and has always given my kids free cookies whenever I’ve taken them there. It was in his greeting that he made what I know is an innocent comment that just rubbed me the wrong way: “Enjoying your weekend with your son?”
My weekend? Every weekend is my weekend with all my kids, I thought. I quickly corrected him and explained that my wife was with my daughter at gymnastics, so we escaped for lunch… just the guys out. He smiled and said,”excellent” and went on his way to continue to greet the other patrons. But I was still upset… not at him, but at the assumption so innocently made. Is this where we are headed as a society?
It seems that more and more people assume that a father alone with a child is not bonding, but taking care of his custodial duties for the weekend. I am aware that this is a fact of life, but shouldn’t we assume first that the father just LIKES spending time with his children and is taking time to enjoy them? And where is this line of questioning heading to? Soon people will begin assuming that a pregnancy is not planned. Will pregant women when approached by a stranger as I was, be asked in lieu of the normal “Is it a boy or a gilr?”, or “When is it due?”, with questions like, “So who’s the father?” or “Are you planning on keeping it?” Is this where we are heading?
It is a sad state of affairs when first assumptions are the norm because the truth is that the norm nowadays is divorce vs. lifelong marriage, and is getting closer to being single parenting vs. the in tact family unit. The reality of life is one thing. Those living these alternate lives are not to be judged any differently in my eyes for the decisions they’ve made. But that shouldn’t change the way things ought to be. The family is MEANT to be father, mother, and children. We should assume unless we know otherwise that others see the family unit in the same way, and that they understand when they are mistakenly asked about an estranged family member that people are only hoping and expecting for the best when these questions are asked.
If you’re wondering, lunch went great. It’s nice to have lunch with your son, especially knowing that I chose to do it and was not mandated to do it by some judge. God bless my family. And may he also bless and guide those who are not as fortunate as I am.
I PROMISE that my next LIFE OCCURRENCE will be more lighthearted. How do I know it will be? Beacuse I already know what it is… nana nana booboo!!